It suddenly dawned on me that there may be people who will discover this blog and presume its about them. Well, to those people, you could not be more incorrect. Its about life, my life and my experiences and serves only as an outlet for myself.
As I sit here, writing again and thinking about the where I've been, where I'm going and who I hope to be when I get there, I cannot help but ask myself If I'm happy.
I know I feel happy, but am I truly satisfied? Are we ever really satisfied or do our achievements leave us wanting more from life and more from ourselves? As August looms and I think about the passing year, I cannot help but wonder if the progress I'm making in my life is sinking in. I think about that classic flick called "Groundhog Day" and I find myself relating. Every day, I do the same thing, over and over again. But does it mean anything? And if so, what? 6:00 am - Wake up. Brew coffee. Brush Teeth.
6:30 am - Walk Fenway (My adorable Boston Terrier pup). Avoid over-zealous, morning talkers in an attempt to not be late to work...again.
7:00 am - Shower. Fix Hair. Get dressed. Make-up optional.
7:45 am - Attempt to eat breakfast. This usually equates to a bowl of Kashi w/Soy milk, oatmeal with blueberries or a piece of fruit from the stand on Vernon and 49th...if I'm lucky.
8:30 am - Walk to the Subway
9:00, 9:10, 9:27, 9:36 am - Work. *The various times reflect the mystery that is the subway system in NYC.
10:00 am - Make second cup of coffee at work.
10am - 3pm - Fast-paced blur of emails, client calls and the occasional psychotic laugh fest amongst my co-workers and myself.
3 pm - Lunch. I rotate between Guy & Gallard, Wild Greens, CPK, or iced water. Depending on how fat I feel that day.
4-6pm - More fast-paced blurs of emails, client calls, project deadlines and even more psychotic laughter amongst my co-workers and myself.
6 pm - Get on Subway to head home.
6:30-7:30 pm - Finally home. Play with Fenway. Change out of work clothes. Walk Fenway.
8pm - Make Dinner.
9-10 pm - Eat dinner. Clean up the kitchen Watch meaningless, yet entertaining reality television. Fall asleep mid-episode.
12 am - Wake up and realize I've fallen asleep.
12:05 am - Turn off the tele. Fall back asleep.
Where do we find purpose in our day in and day out?
I find myself feeling so lucky everyday as I think about everything I have around me and yet, I cannot tame that feeling of wanting more. I cannot stop feeling unsatisfied with what I have achieved. I find myself longing for something even greater than my mind can grasp.
How can someone who has an amazing job that makes them happy, a stunning apartment, a loving family, a breathtaking view and so much more still be left desiring more?Can we really, ever, feel satisfied with life or will we always find ourselves longing, desiring, relentlessly wanting more from life...never truly feeling complete?
